As Humans,we tend to cheat in a haze of hallucination,hoping that it will bring us real love, help us have better sex,lift our spirits,and boost our sagging self-esteem.Very often, however,cheating ends up wrecking multiple relationships and actually eroding our confidence and sense of self.
I have seen religious people who cheat for the fun of it, and people who say they cheat despite the fact that they are happy with their spouses/partners.In a survey over a third of cheating women and over half of cheating men disclosed that they were perfectly content with their long-term relationships and cheated despite their satisfaction. So then, who can cheat? Anyone!….Anytime! …….Anyplace!.
Alright so before we set off ,let me say this :Naturally, Men are Logical beings and Women are Emotional Beings.A man can cheat,have sex with a woman without having any feelings or an iota of love for the woman.However,most women attach feelings/emotions when cheating.In other words,they cheat because they do love the person unless they are working as prostitutes.
In today’s article, we are going to have a comprehensive outlook as to Why Men Cheat . To begin with lets talk about;
The Three Determinants of Cheating
• Culture—the environment around you,with its varying messages about sex, love, and adultery that inform both your opinions about and opportunities for infidelity
•Brain—the neurological structures and chemistry that evolution gave you •Psychology—the mind that you’ve developed through formative experiences that imprint certain ways of thinking about the world,your place in it, and how you think about your sexual/romantic self.
This means that more than half of what pushes a man to take the plunge to cheat has to do with both one’s environment and one’s psychology. The most significant environmental cause is the fact that we can cheat. The easier it is to do, the more likely we will do it. Cheating is not confined to sleazy people.Under the right circumstances it is very easy to turn lustful thoughts into desperate actions.
When it comes to the psychology of cheaters, the biggest factor driving them to stray is the feeling that they’re entitled or deserve to cheat.Research and clinical experience have identified certain personality traits to be associated with this feeling:
- Narcissism—feeling self-entitled and putting one’s needs first
- Lacking empathy—not being able to put oneself in another person’s shoes
- Grandiosity—overestimating one’s abilities, especially one’s sexual prowess, and needing validation for one’s abilities as a lover
- Being impulsive—making important decisions,with major consequences,on the fly
- Being a novelty or thrill seeker
- Having an avoidant attachment style—fearing commitment
- Being self-destructive or masochistic
Now that you have gained full cognizance about the psychology surrounding cheating,lets dive into some of the reasons why men cheat a lot.
Reasons Why Men Cheat
Insecurity: He may feel as if he is too old (or too young), not handsome enough, not rich enough, not smart enough, etc. (An astonishing amount of male cheating is linked, at least in part, to a mid-life crisis.) To bolster his flagging ego, he seeks validation from women other than his mate, using this sextracurricular spark of interest to feel wanted, desired, and worthy.
Immaturity: If he does not have a lot of experience in committed relationships, or if he doesn’t fully understand that his actions will inevitably have consequences like hurting his partner, he may think it is fine to have sexual adventures. He might think of his commitment to monogamy as a jacket that he can put on or take off as he pleases, depending on the circumstances.
Childhood Abuse: He may be reenacting or responding to unresolved childhood trauma—neglect, emotional abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse, etc. In such cases, his childhood wounds have created attachment and intimacy issues that leave him unable or unwilling to fully commit to one person. He might also be using the excitement and distraction of sexual infidelity as a way to self-soothe the pain of these old, unhealed wounds.
Desire (The Engine of The Affair) : Affairs are actually built not in the bedroom but in the mind.Concocted in our irrationally exuberant and sometimes desperate imaginings, affairs draw their power from deep wants and needs. Desire has a way of getting us engaged,keeping us in a zonked-out zone,getting lost in lust and love, and, in some cases, blinding us to self destructive choices
Unrealistic Expectations: He may feel that his partner should meet his every whim and desire, sexual and otherwise, 24/7, regardless of how she feels at any particular moment. He fails to understand that she has a life of her own, with thoughts and feelings and needs that don’t always involve him. When his expectations are not met, he seeks external fulfillment.
Anger, Revenge: He may cheat to get revenge. He is angry with his mate and wants to hurt her. In such cases, the infidelity is meant to be seen and known. The man does not bother to lie or keep secrets about his cheating, because he wants his partner to know about it.
It’s Over, Version 1: He may want to end his current relationship. However, instead of just telling his partner that he’s unhappy and wants to break things off, he cheats and then forces her to do the dirty work.
It’s Over(2): He may want to end his current relationship, but not until he’s got another one lined up. So he sets the stage for his next relationship while still in the first one.
So these are some of the reasons why men cheat. For most men, no single factor drives the decision to cheat. Their reasons for cheating evolves as their life circumstances change.